We sat a lifetime or two in the pause after their question “why wouldn’t you put your name forward for consideration…?” My tongue grew three sizes bigger it seemed and I had no audible response. See at times I fall back into old fears and feel “less than” compared to my peers in recovery. Finding recovery in communities with few other Black Canadians I often shied away from larger service opportunities as I felt less popular than others or like my excitement would be misread as one of many stereotypes I’ve experienced before. That said, it was seeing others like me in the meeting rooms and later at all levels of service in AA that made me feel like I could achieve a spiritual bump and be of service to the community and program I owe my life to.
Fast forward a month and I had been interviewed and notified that I was appointed co-chair to the Training and Orientation Subcommittee. I remember walking through the double doors at the Alano Club to meet all the other chairs and co-chairs selected. As we went around the room to introduce ourselves, again I got flashes of imposter syndrome. Besides what did I know about Training and Orientation anyway.
Then I met my subcommittee chair Lisa. I knew her in passing but we had never worked together in service. What a delight it has been! Together we started a practice of sharing heart images we find in community, we bounced ideas back and forth about who to invite to join us in service and were welcomed by a diverse and loving group. Collectively we tried to apply the Language of the Heart to our process and our responsibilities. We kept asking ourselves, “is there anyone who gets excluded by the choices our subcommittee made and if so, how do we do the next right thing?”
This was evident in:
- the music choices from around the world curated for the initial kick-off;
- creating a Language of the Heart visual board for members to share messages of appreciation for the program of AA and in varied languages;
- the mini-flag ceremony aligning as best as possible nationals with the countries exhibited from each continent; and
- the color selection for the volunteer t-shirts!
I could go on and on with examples. We made sure to welcome the minority voice in our subcommittee meetings and trusted the group conscience that surfaced time after time in our subcommittee meetings, with the core committee, and through the chairs and co-chairs who assisted our work along the way. Together we built a spiritual momentum and strength that was infectious.
Soon I had a volunteer sponsor for the first time, I had a host of friends checking in to celebrate our convention goals, and I began to have tangible examples of the 12 Traditions and 12 Concepts at work in my spiritual life. This re-energized my program of recovery too and now I feel I am vibrating with excitement, welcomes and celebrated as a part of a loving team who continue to share their varied gifts and step beyond their comfort zones to be sure we can welcome tens of thousands of Alcoholics to the Province of BC and the city of Vancouver.
See you in less than seven days and it’s never too late to volunteer your time and talents so you too can feel the warm pipeline of the creator calibrating your spiritual condition to see opportunities, gifts and connection over doubt, deficits, and isolation. I can’t wait to meet you and welcome you fondly!
In love and service,
Jules
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